








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 242 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 53 matches | ||
| Premier | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 21 matches | ||
| Wingman | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 17 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




42 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1518 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,114 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1932 | 38% |
| Smokes | 864 | 17% |
| HE Grenades | 1397 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 921 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $384,053 of utility $119 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1798 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hugo | 50% | 18 |
| #2 | SEHÄN ON ÄIJÄ TOI MUIJA | 49% | 71 |
| #3 | Alexander clutch | 42% | 24 |
| #4 | JorgosB | 41% | 49 |
| #5 | citroen | 38% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | SEHÄN ON ÄIJÄ TOI MUIJA | 49% | 71 |
| #3 | Alexander clutch | 42% | 24 |
| #4 | JorgosB | 41% | 49 |
| #5 | citroen | 38% | 13 |
| #6 | REAL SCOTT | 29% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SEHÄN ON ÄIJÄ TOI MUIJA | 9 | 0.0061 |
| #2 | REAL SCOTT | 7 | 0.0275 |
| #3 | JorgosB | 6 | 0.0062 |
| #4 | Alexander clutch | 2 | 0.0045 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SEHÄN ON ÄIJÄ TOI MUIJA | 311 | 0.21 | 7 min |
| #2 | JorgosB | 193 | 0.20 | 4 min |
| #3 | Hugo | 80 | 0.24 | 2 min |
| #4 | Alexander clutch | 38 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #5 | REAL SCOTT | 30 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SEHÄN ON ÄIJÄ TOI MUIJA | +1.81 | 74 | 62 |
| #2 | japE | +1.05 | 73 | 49 |
| #3 | Hugo | -0.72 | 39 | 52 |
| #4 | REAL SCOTT | -1.51 | 63 | 53 |
| #5 | Alexander clutch | -1.57 | 55 | 39 |





