








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 12 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 130 matches | ||
| Wingman | 60 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1079 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,514 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 570 | 23% |
| Smokes | 707 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 897 | 36% |
| Molotovs | 340 | 14% |
Our logs show you have wasted $605,206 of utility $144 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | slaya* | 50% | 14 |
| #2 | Lyka.Lc | 50% | 16 |
| #3 | Antix | 46% | 54 |
| #4 | Patrick duprés | 34% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | slaya* | 50% | 14 |
| #2 | Lyka.Lc | 50% | 16 |
| #3 | Antix | 46% | 54 |
| #4 | Patrick duprés | 34% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Patrick duprés | 9 | 0.0167 |
| #2 | Antix | 4 | 0.0046 |
| #3 | slaya* | 3 | 0.0139 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Antix | 88 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #2 | slaya* | 23 | 0.11 | 0 min |
| #3 | Lyka.Lc | 15 | 0.05 | 0 min |
| #4 | Patrick duprés | 4 | 0.01 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Antix | +5.36 | 70 | 68 |
| #2 | slaya* | +1.79 | 65 | 29 |
| #3 | Lyka.Lc | +1.30 | 50 | 27 |
| #4 | Patrick duprés | -1.24 | 46 | 40 |
| #5 | yatsu | -4.98 | 25 | 30 |





