








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 622 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 77 matches | ||
| Wingman | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 11 matches | ||
| Premier | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 39 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




95 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1613 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,114 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1077 | 35% |
| Smokes | 884 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 474 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 679 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,652,339 of utility $275 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1275 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FODS Gaming | 67% | 18 |
| #2 | SLUTTBOY SMITTY | 59% | 17 |
| #3 | Phantom | 53% | 129 |
| #4 | ᶠᶸᶜᵏᵧₒᵤ | 50% | 30 |
| #5 | meandmyslimes | 50% | 130 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | meandmyslimes | 37 | 0.0161 |
| #2 | [GSK] TruckAWPerator | 19 | 0.0185 |
| #3 | Phantom | 18 | 0.0075 |
| #4 | [GSK]CAPTAIN | 12 | 0.0096 |
| #5 | [GSK] Sklmr | 11 | 0.0115 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | meandmyslimes | 303 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| #2 | Phantom | 248 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| #3 | [GSK] TruckAWPerator | 73 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #4 | ᶠᶸᶜᵏᵧₒᵤ | 51 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #5 | [GSK] Sklmr | 45 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Phantom | +7.19 | 81 | 50 |
| #2 | [GSK] TruckAWPerator | +3.13 | 45 | 36 |
| #3 | meandmyslimes | +3.10 | 51 | 33 |
| #4 | SLUTTBOY SMITTY | +1.82 | 26 | 48 |
| #5 | FODS Gaming | +1.54 | 25 | 48 |





