










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 92 matches | ||
| Wingman | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




24 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
746 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,143 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 284 | 25% |
| Smokes | 360 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 162 | 14% |
| Molotovs | 337 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $367,947 of utility $120 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 171 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lanmi majami | 48% | 27 |
| #2 | Merk | 47% | 138 |
| #3 | B0sanch3roX | 42% | 81 |
| #4 | K R K O | 35% | 48 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lanmi majami | 48% | 27 |
| #2 | Merk | 47% | 138 |
| #3 | B0sanch3roX | 42% | 81 |
| #4 | K R K O | 35% | 48 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | B0sanch3roX | 24 | 0.0150 |
| #2 | Merk | 22 | 0.0089 |
| #3 | K R K O | 10 | 0.0109 |
| #4 | Lanmi majami | 5 | 0.0099 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Merk | 157 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| #2 | B0sanch3roX | 91 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #3 | K R K O | 47 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #4 | Lanmi majami | 10 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Merk | +2.80 | 42 | 42 |
| #2 | B0sanch3roX | +1.92 | 59 | 33 |
| #3 | Lanmi majami | -0.21 | 19 | 14 |
| #4 | K R K O | -1.86 | 9 | 27 |
| #5 | e | -2.60 | 11 | 25 |





