








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 393 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 730 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 28 matches | ||
| Wingman | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 23 different maps





Our logs show 37 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




67 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7453 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 24,818 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5593 | 23% |
| Smokes | 8217 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 5677 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 5331 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,197,640 of utility $119 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 992 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jonari | 53% | 241 |
| #2 | ✪Тяiи1ty | 52% | 504 |
| #3 | Noddy | 47% | 438 |
| #4 | NiDe | 45% | 69 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jonari | 53% | 241 |
| #2 | ✪Тяiи1ty | 52% | 504 |
| #3 | Noddy | 47% | 438 |
| #4 | NiDe | 45% | 69 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪Тяiи1ty | 77 | 0.0074 |
| #2 | Noddy | 40 | 0.0044 |
| #3 | Jonari | 7 | 0.0014 |
| #4 | NiDe | 1 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪Тяiи1ty | 2216 | 0.21 | 53 min |
| #2 | Jonari | 1783 | 0.36 | 45 min |
| #3 | Noddy | 1058 | 0.12 | 27 min |
| #4 | NiDe | 274 | 0.19 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪Тяiи1ty | +2.99 | 81 | 72 |
| #2 | Jonari | +1.70 | 72 | 68 |
| #3 | NiDe | +1.14 | 73 | 70 |
| #4 | Noddy | -0.68 | 52 | 64 |
| #5 | Tëинapи | -1.56 | 45 | 59 |





