








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 237 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 273 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 51 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 28 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 41 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4566 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 18,050 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6560 | 36% |
| Smokes | 4594 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 5130 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 1766 | 10% |
Our logs show you have wasted $633,882 of utility $74 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 212 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ⚡ Shaz3m | 57% | 101 |
| #2 | Alfi | 57% | 21 |
| #3 | 🌼Niki🌼 | 57% | 23 |
| #4 | Łock™ | 53% | 47 |
| #5 | hL* | 53% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Alfi | 57% | 21 |
| #3 | 🌼Niki🌼 | 57% | 23 |
| #4 | Łock™ | 53% | 47 |
| #5 | hL* | 53% | 36 |
| #6 | 1hit1hs gun only | 42% | 26 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Łock™ | 4 | 0.0047 |
| #2 | ⚡ Shaz3m | 3 | 0.0014 |
| #3 | hL* | 1 | 0.0012 |
| #4 | 1hit1hs gun only | 1 | 0.0019 |
| #5 | 🌼Niki🌼 | 1 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Łock™ | 124 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| #2 | 1hit1hs gun only | 101 | 0.19 | 2 min |
| #3 | hL* | 76 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #4 | ⚡ Shaz3m | 46 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| #5 | Alfi | 21 | 0.07 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♕Miáú♕ | +2.70 | 58 | 71 |
| #2 | 1hit1hs gun only | +1.25 | 67 | 45 |
| #3 | hL* | +0.33 | 69 | 68 |
| #4 | 🌼Niki🌼 | +0.16 | 64 | 39 |
| #5 | Łock™ | -0.68 | 59 | 74 |





