








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 520 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 60 matches | ||
| Premier | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 31 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1864 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,529 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1088 | 31% |
| Smokes | 901 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 740 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 800 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $765,299 of utility $237 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 96 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ”MelleNator" | 80% | 10 |
| #2 | Rush B | 64% | 14 |
| #3 | BOT OSTRO | 63% | 46 |
| #4 | Drake | 60% | 35 |
| #5 | Nisse | 55% | 31 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Rush B | 64% | 14 |
| #3 | BOT OSTRO | 63% | 46 |
| #4 | Drake | 60% | 35 |
| #5 | Nisse | 55% | 31 |
| #6 | Donald Trump:) | 55% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BOT OSTRO | 10 | 0.0121 |
| #2 | Drake | 6 | 0.0089 |
| #3 | Rush B | 2 | 0.0069 |
| #4 | Donald Trump:) | 2 | 0.0082 |
| #5 | ”MelleNator" | 2 | 0.0096 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BOT OSTRO | 136 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| #2 | Drake | 47 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #3 | Nisse | 40 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #4 | Rush B | 38 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #5 | Donald Trump:) | 15 | 0.06 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Donaldo Trumpiano | +3.86 | 77 | 46 |
| #2 | Drake | +2.70 | 65 | 60 |
| #3 | Nisse | +2.38 | 73 | 52 |
| #4 | Rush B | -1.02 | 33 | 51 |
| #5 | ”MelleNator" | -1.65 | 37 | 32 |





