








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 43 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 54 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Premier | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
649 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,799 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 679 | 24% |
| Smokes | 725 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 701 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 694 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $188,421 of utility $125 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 204 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cross the Sun | 64% | 11 |
| #2 | Heikkimr | 57% | 56 |
| #3 | Juhani Lehtonen 1970 | 50% | 4 |
| #4 | YoungGoblin_BrokeAgain | 25% | 4 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cross the Sun | 64% | 11 |
| #2 | Heikkimr | 57% | 56 |
| #3 | Juhani Lehtonen 1970 | 50% | 4 |
| #4 | YoungGoblin_BrokeAgain | 25% | 4 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | YoungGoblin_BrokeAgain | 3 | 0.0385 |
| #2 | Heikkimr | 1 | 0.0008 |
| #3 | Cross the Sun | 1 | 0.0060 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Heikkimr | 150 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| #2 | Cross the Sun | 40 | 0.24 | 1 min |
| #3 | YoungGoblin_BrokeAgain | 6 | 0.08 | 0 min |
| #4 | Juhani Lehtonen 1970 | 3 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Heikkimr | +1.39 | 78 | 51 |
| #2 | rasvainen.vahigna | -1.20 | 64 | 60 |
| #3 | YoungGoblin_BrokeAgain | -1.45 | 61 | 72 |
| #4 | Cross the Sun | -2.91 | 36 | 51 |
| #5 | Juhani Lehtonen 1970 | -3.68 | 39 | 15 |





