










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 361 matches | ||
| Wingman | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 162 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




20 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4177 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,731 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3392 | 29% |
| Smokes | 2738 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 3181 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 2420 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,170,338 of utility $248 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 142 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SmokerRino | 58% | 33 |
| #2 | Alice-D | 49% | 82 |
| #3 | not Dwight | 48% | 27 |
| #4 | ✟ noob ✟ | 48% | 151 |
| #5 | KeAZz | 46% | 26 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SmokerRino | 58% | 33 |
| #2 | Alice-D | 49% | 82 |
| #3 | not Dwight | 48% | 27 |
| #4 | ✟ noob ✟ | 48% | 151 |
| #5 | KeAZz | 46% | 26 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✟ noob ✟ | 5 | 0.0016 |
| #2 | Alice-D | 3 | 0.0018 |
| #3 | KeAZz | 1 | 0.0018 |
| #4 | not Dwight | 1 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✟ noob ✟ | 99 | 0.03 | 3 min |
| #2 | SmokerRino | 69 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #3 | not Dwight | 69 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #4 | KeAZz | 58 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #5 | Alice-D | 52 | 0.03 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪St3r0 | +2.18 | 88 | 60 |
| #2 | KeAZz | +2.00 | 74 | 50 |
| #3 | SmokerRino | +1.02 | 66 | 61 |
| #4 | not Dwight | +0.96 | 69 | 76 |
| #5 | ✟ noob ✟ | -3.39 | 41 | 46 |





