








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 123 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 184 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1954 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,905 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1677 | 28% |
| Smokes | 1057 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 1875 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 1296 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $472,364 of utility $96 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 102 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jodagehts | 57% | 54 |
| #2 | Ringelwurm | 56% | 16 |
| #3 | Vini Paff | 56% | 43 |
| #4 | FcePnch | 51% | 109 |
| #5 | G59 | 47% | 45 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Ringelwurm | 56% | 16 |
| #3 | Vini Paff | 56% | 43 |
| #4 | FcePnch | 51% | 109 |
| #5 | G59 | 47% | 45 |
| #6 | bomber | 43% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FcePnch | 9 | 0.0040 |
| #2 | Vini Paff | 6 | 0.0065 |
| #3 | jodagehts | 2 | 0.0018 |
| #4 | G59 | 1 | 0.0012 |
| #5 | bomber | 1 | 0.0022 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FcePnch | 188 | 0.08 | 4 min |
| #2 | G59 | 134 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| #3 | Vini Paff | 88 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #4 | bomber | 63 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| #5 | jodagehts | 54 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bomber | +0.72 | 74 | 58 |
| #2 | inqperi | +0.22 | 60 | 48 |
| #3 | Vini Paff | +0.18 | 68 | 55 |
| #4 | Ringelwurm | -0.43 | 58 | 65 |
| #5 | FcePnch | -0.94 | 63 | 59 |





