








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 140 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 293 matches | ||
| Wingman | 121 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 20 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




119 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6490 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 22,641 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 9207 | 41% |
| Smokes | 5241 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 4138 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 4055 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,357,048 of utility $106 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1045 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | yung sheldon | 67% | 51 |
| #2 | willy | 57% | 76 |
| #3 | Dumpling Down | 52% | 103 |
| #4 | 00ChevyS10 | 52% | 83 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | yung sheldon | 67% | 51 |
| #2 | willy | 57% | 76 |
| #3 | Dumpling Down | 52% | 103 |
| #4 | 00ChevyS10 | 52% | 83 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dumpling Down | 23 | 0.0115 |
| #2 | willy | 11 | 0.0071 |
| #3 | yung sheldon | 8 | 0.0078 |
| #4 | 00ChevyS10 | 5 | 0.0031 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | willy | 475 | 0.31 | 12 min |
| #2 | yung sheldon | 239 | 0.23 | 5 min |
| #3 | 00ChevyS10 | 225 | 0.14 | 8 min |
| #4 | Dumpling Down | 101 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | yung sheldon | +4.97 | 80 | 62 |
| #2 | ★ bLast! | +2.79 | 71 | 67 |
| #3 | 00ChevyS10 | +2.45 | 58 | 76 |
| #4 | willy | +1.37 | 72 | 66 |
| #5 | Dumpling Down | -1.08 | 44 | 40 |





