








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 5 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 67 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1365 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,090 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 702 | 34% |
| Smokes | 496 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 575 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 317 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $27,242 of utility $10 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1 message into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MIA la la la | 65% | 17 |
| #2 | sidf9t | 46% | 37 |
| #3 | KillIT | 40% | 10 |
| #4 | Cyrus | 39% | 59 |
| #5 | Jerry | 33% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cyrus | 12 | 0.0097 |
| #2 | sidf9t | 4 | 0.0051 |
| #3 | Jerry | 1 | 0.0045 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cyrus | 70 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #2 | MIA la la la | 70 | 0.20 | 1 min |
| #3 | sidf9t | 37 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #4 | KillIT | 18 | 0.10 | 0 min |
| #5 | Jerry | 6 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MIA la la la | +5.24 | 79 | 56 |
| #2 | Luna | +1.32 | 59 | 42 |
| #3 | Jerry | +1.21 | 42 | 24 |
| #4 | Cyrus | +0.25 | 53 | 58 |
| #5 | KillIT | -0.69 | 49 | 67 |





