








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 96 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 32 matches | ||
| Wingman | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




73 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
754 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,050 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 251 | 24% |
| Smokes | 260 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 224 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 315 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $131,151 of utility $73 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 705 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | [241] Angeled-Mercedes | 38% | 40 |
| #2 | HИGGERL0SE | 33% | 6 |
| #3 | M0uDy | 32% | 38 |
| #4 | penguin | 21% | 34 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | [241] Angeled-Mercedes | 38% | 40 |
| #2 | HИGGERL0SE | 33% | 6 |
| #3 | M0uDy | 32% | 38 |
| #4 | penguin | 21% | 34 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | M0uDy | 27 | 0.0333 |
| #2 | penguin | 20 | 0.0320 |
| #3 | [241] Angeled-Mercedes | 19 | 0.0230 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | penguin | 138 | 0.22 | 2 min |
| #2 | M0uDy | 118 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| #3 | [241] Angeled-Mercedes | 105 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #4 | HИGGERL0SE | 4 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | penguin | +3.44 | 55 | 32 |
| #2 | [241] Angeled-Mercedes | +2.03 | 24 | 48 |
| #3 | Kita | +0.24 | 44 | 16 |
| #4 | M0uDy | -0.13 | 28 | 31 |
| #5 | HИGGERL0SE | -2.44 | 41 | 7 |





