








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 644 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 226 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 35 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




32 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6018 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 18,948 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5720 | 30% |
| Smokes | 6839 | 36% |
| HE Grenades | 2520 | 13% |
| Molotovs | 3869 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,533,981 of utility $132 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 251 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | raven | 54% | 79 |
| #2 | Jeykey | 49% | 35 |
| #3 | SmileyKylie6 | 32% | 56 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | raven | 54% | 79 |
| #2 | Jeykey | 49% | 35 |
| #3 | SmileyKylie6 | 32% | 56 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jeykey | 4 | 0.0060 |
| #2 | raven | 3 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | raven | 121 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #2 | SmileyKylie6 | 54 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #3 | Jeykey | 25 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JGK | +2.46 | 69 | 58 |
| #2 | raven | +0.12 | 75 | 49 |
| #3 | Jeykey | -1.14 | 51 | 30 |
| #4 | SmileyKylie6 | -5.62 | 42 | 41 |





