










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 660 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 285 matches | ||
| Wingman | 154 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 40 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




45 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3748 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,745 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1546 | 20% |
| Smokes | 1955 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 2067 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 2177 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,950,906 of utility $213 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 381 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Donkey | 49% | 190 |
| #2 | Snacky1YT | 45% | 56 |
| #3 | Crimson | 35% | 26 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Donkey | 49% | 190 |
| #2 | Snacky1YT | 45% | 56 |
| #3 | Crimson | 35% | 26 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Donkey | 38 | 0.0096 |
| #2 | Snacky1YT | 31 | 0.0270 |
| #3 | Crimson | 3 | 0.0070 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Donkey | 206 | 0.05 | 5 min |
| #2 | Snacky1YT | 60 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #3 | Crimson | 45 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Plat | +0.56 | 49 | 40 |
| #2 | Snacky1YT | -0.64 | 36 | 45 |
| #3 | Donkey | -1.25 | 37 | 47 |
| #4 | Crimson | -1.78 | 53 | 38 |





