








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 167 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 178 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 12 matches | ||
| Wingman | 10 matches | ||
| Faceit | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 20 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




81 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1573 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,706 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1242 | 26% |
| Smokes | 1264 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 1096 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 1104 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $796,038 of utility $137 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1139 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ravalo | 55% | 130 |
| 48% | 29 | ||
| 45% | 49 | ||
| 40% | 15 | ||
| #5 | Somebody | 38% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ravalo | 55% | 130 |
| 48% | 29 | ||
| 45% | 49 | ||
| 40% | 15 | ||
| #5 | Somebody | 38% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| 18 | 0.0188 | ||
| 8 | 0.0223 | ||
| 4 | 0.0074 | ||
| #4 | Ravalo | 2 | 0.0008 |
| #5 | Somebody | 1 | 0.0024 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ravalo | 214 | 0.09 | 5 min |
| 73 | 0.20 | 1 min | ||
| #3 | Somebody | 46 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| 27 | 0.05 | 1 min | ||
| 25 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ravalo | +2.93 | 77 | 40 |
| #2 | Somebody | +2.39 | 75 | 44 |
| +2.08 | 59 | 35 | ||
| +2.01 | 76 | 54 | ||
| -3.02 | 41 | 38 |





