








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 234 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 47 matches | ||
| Premier | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1063 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,569 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 676 | 26% |
| Smokes | 632 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 598 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 663 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $185,296 of utility $127 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 88 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Big Nemesis | 55% | 11 |
| #6 | Alberto del rio | 46% | 13 |
| #7 | Vilda | 40% | 5 |
| #8 | T1mM | 25% | 4 |
| #9 | human | 25% | 4 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | d3vu | +3.51 | 87 | 68 |
| #2 | ISB11 | +1.24 | 82 | 70 |
| #3 | Alberto del rio | +0.44 | 83 | 63 |
| #4 | Big Nemesis | +0.39 | 82 | 72 |
| #5 | Vilda | -1.23 | 66 | 60 |





