










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 94 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Faceit | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 29 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




18 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2195 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,811 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2422 | 27% |
| Smokes | 2695 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 1809 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 1885 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $342,855 of utility $70 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 629 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fruitz. | 16 | 0.0147 |
| #2 | MOO7_ | 7 | 0.0158 |
| #3 | Drogba SKINS | 6 | 0.0063 |
| #4 | ЯąHiM | 5 | 0.0062 |
| #5 | 𝐃𝐄𝐒𝐇 | 5 | 0.0078 |





