










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 108 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
994 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,665 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 654 | 18% |
| Smokes | 1285 | 35% |
| HE Grenades | 901 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 825 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $167,477 of utility $53 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 34 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Boer | 50% | 10 |
| #2 | MFL | 46% | 13 |
| #3 | Play Hard | 45% | 11 |
| #4 | J0L1ix | 40% | 20 |
| #5 | ❤JabsiwHowl❤ | 32% | 19 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Play Hard | 45% | 11 |
| #4 | J0L1ix | 40% | 20 |
| #5 | ❤JabsiwHowl❤ | 32% | 19 |
| #6 | MamaZitta | 27% | 11 |
| #7 | Tuml1ng | 18% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | J0L1ix | 3 | 0.0081 |
| #2 | Tuml1ng | 2 | 0.0048 |
| #3 | ❤JabsiwHowl❤ | 2 | 0.0055 |
| #4 | MFL | 1 | 0.0035 |
| #5 | Play Hard | 1 | 0.0046 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tuml1ng | 70 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| #2 | MFL | 37 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #3 | J0L1ix | 17 | 0.05 | 0 min |
| #4 | ❤JabsiwHowl❤ | 12 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| #5 | Play Hard | 8 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Boer | +7.63 | 62 | 55 |
| #2 | MFL | +1.54 | 40 | 43 |
| #3 | ❤JabsiwHowl❤ | +0.75 | 50 | 43 |
| #4 | Play Hard | -0.01 | 20 | 38 |
| #5 | emilbnc | -0.61 | 28 | 35 |





