










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 71 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
231 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 122 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 48 | 39% |
| Smokes | 20 | 16% |
| HE Grenades | 48 | 39% |
| Molotovs | 6 | 5% |
Our logs show you have wasted $212,680 of utility $287 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | schmimimmi | 50% | 10 |
| #2 | PaulHaltsMaul | 33% | 21 |
| #3 | lyrae | 25% | 4 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | schmimimmi | 50% | 10 |
| #2 | PaulHaltsMaul | 33% | 21 |
| #3 | lyrae | 25% | 4 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PaulHaltsMaul | 1 | 0.0026 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PaulHaltsMaul | 56 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| #2 | schmimimmi | 17 | 0.09 | 0 min |
| #3 | lyrae | 13 | 0.18 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PaulHaltsMaul | +1.35 | 52 | 54 |
| #2 | schmimimmi | -2.16 | 47 | 44 |
| #3 | Traubenschorle | -2.86 | 20 | 14 |
| #4 | lyrae | -4.05 | 19 | 28 |





