








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 67 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 59 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Faceit | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




27 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
945 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 948 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 243 | 26% |
| Smokes | 114 | 12% |
| HE Grenades | 349 | 37% |
| Molotovs | 242 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $255,775 of utility $147 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 255 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | n!K | 55% | 11 |
| #2 | L0SA | 52% | 25 |
| #3 | Ac9M | 50% | 6 |
| #4 | Djura | 42% | 19 |
| #5 | Himke1Upâ„¢ | 42% | 31 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Himke1Upâ„¢ | +6.49 | 89 | 48 |
| #2 | ブラック・ウィドウ | +3.89 | 89 | 45 |
| #3 | L0SA | +1.11 | 68 | 63 |
| #4 | C9H13N | -0.29 | 75 | 32 |
| #5 | Yuga | -0.69 | 51 | 31 |





