








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 95 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 33 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
135 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 88 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 40 | 45% |
| Smokes | 7 | 8% |
| HE Grenades | 21 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 20 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $17,564 of utility $28 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 91 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ㄒ丂爪 | 33% | 3 |
| #2 | Valtteri Valkoinen | 32% | 38 |
| #3 | Zereboy | 25% | 4 |
| #4 | pikkumyy<3 | 0% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ㄒ丂爪 | 33% | 3 |
| #2 | Valtteri Valkoinen | 32% | 38 |
| #3 | Zereboy | 25% | 4 |
| #4 | pikkumyy<3 | 0% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Valtteri Valkoinen | 25 | 0.0478 |
| #2 | pikkumyy<3 | 9 | 0.0833 |
| #3 | Zereboy | 5 | 0.0758 |
| #4 | ㄒ丂爪 | 2 | 0.0526 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pikkumyy<3 | 36 | 0.33 | 1 min |
| #2 | Valtteri Valkoinen | 35 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #3 | Zereboy | 8 | 0.12 | 0 min |
| #4 | ㄒ丂爪 | 2 | 0.05 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Valtteri Valkoinen | +6.06 | 71 | 30 |
| #2 | pikkumyy<3 | +1.73 | 58 | 69 |
| #3 | ㄒ丂爪 | +0.95 | 22 | 66 |
| #4 | Zereboy | +0.13 | 27 | 40 |
| #5 | XXX_testicles_Gaming | -4.51 | 47 | 2 |





