








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 247 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 68 matches | ||
| Premier | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 22 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1297 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,854 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 773 | 20% |
| Smokes | 1366 | 35% |
| HE Grenades | 1056 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 659 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $483,245 of utility $152 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 249 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | twitch.tv//jokeroffhell31 | 50% | 16 |
| #2 | M4RC0S | 44% | 16 |
| #3 | Cremathoria | 42% | 19 |
| #4 | Jaccko | 33% | 9 |
| #5 | Vašek | 31% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | twitch.tv//jokeroffhell31 | 50% | 16 |
| #2 | M4RC0S | 44% | 16 |
| #3 | Cremathoria | 42% | 19 |
| #4 | Jaccko | 33% | 9 |
| #5 | Vašek | 31% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vašek | 1 | 0.0028 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | twitch.tv//jokeroffhell31 | 41 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #2 | Cremathoria | 38 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #3 | Vašek | 32 | 0.09 | 0 min |
| #4 | M4RC0S | 17 | 0.05 | 0 min |
| #5 | Jaccko | 5 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vašek | +0.47 | 63 | 57 |
| #2 | M4RC0S | +0.27 | 44 | 45 |
| #3 | Cremathoria | +0.11 | 48 | 62 |
| #4 | twitch.tv//jokeroffhell31 | -0.52 | 27 | 75 |
| #5 | XAW1 | -0.58 | 67 | 42 |





