








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 80 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 78 matches | ||
| Wingman | 56 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




22 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
919 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 638 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 261 | 41% |
| Smokes | 171 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 56 | 9% |
| Molotovs | 150 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $189,141 of utility $66 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 15 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | INF-Vojta_ | 45% | 11 |
| #2 | INF | Zerk0n_CZ | 41% | 90 |
| #3 | tapotaky | 38% | 16 |
| #4 | スピードボーイ | 38% | 32 |
| #5 | med1k | 32% | 34 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | INF-Vojta_ | 45% | 11 |
| #2 | INF | Zerk0n_CZ | 41% | 90 |
| #3 | tapotaky | 38% | 16 |
| #4 | スピードボーイ | 38% | 32 |
| #5 | med1k | 32% | 34 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | INF | Zerk0n_CZ | 13 | 0.0087 |
| #2 | med1k | 8 | 0.0164 |
| #3 | tapotaky | 3 | 0.0114 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | INF-Vojta_ | 16 | 0.09 | 0 min |
| #2 | med1k | 11 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| #3 | INF | Zerk0n_CZ | 10 | 0.01 | 0 min |
| #4 | スピードボーイ | 9 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| #5 | tapotaky | 6 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | INF | Zerk0n_CZ | +5.33 | 69 | 14 |
| #2 | tapotaky | +0.79 | 60 | 16 |
| #3 | IamAce | -1.20 | 16 | 13 |
| #4 | スピードボーイ | -1.26 | 24 | 26 |
| #5 | med1k | -1.52 | 67 | 13 |





