








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 11 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 114 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




48 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
781 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,682 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 648 | 24% |
| Smokes | 871 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 763 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 400 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $279,117 of utility $109 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | toilet cleaner | 72% | 18 |
| #2 | nauravabuddha | 65% | 23 |
| #3 | Jamal James | 61% | 28 |
| #4 | Von Skitzenhoff | 43% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | toilet cleaner | 72% | 18 |
| #2 | nauravabuddha | 65% | 23 |
| #3 | Jamal James | 61% | 28 |
| #4 | Von Skitzenhoff | 43% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jamal James | 4 | 0.0075 |
| #2 | toilet cleaner | 3 | 0.0088 |
| #3 | nauravabuddha | 1 | 0.0022 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jamal James | 59 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #2 | toilet cleaner | 30 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #3 | nauravabuddha | 8 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| #4 | Von Skitzenhoff | 5 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | toilet cleaner | +6.01 | 85 | 55 |
| #2 | Jamal James | +2.60 | 62 | 66 |
| #3 | JALLUKOLA | +0.07 | 55 | 53 |
| #4 | nauravabuddha | -3.48 | 34 | 37 |
| #5 | Von Skitzenhoff | -3.66 | 19 | 49 |





