








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 135 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 63 matches | ||
| Faceit | 18 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 14 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
793 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,818 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1019 | 36% |
| Smokes | 572 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 593 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 634 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $419,922 of utility $197 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 8 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sakkkeli | 67% | 6 |
| #2 | -25Free-Elo | 67% | 9 |
| #3 | hemo dogg | 63% | 8 |
| #4 | Puhti | 0% | 6 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sakkkeli | 67% | 6 |
| #2 | -25Free-Elo | 67% | 9 |
| #3 | hemo dogg | 63% | 8 |
| #4 | Puhti | 0% | 6 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | -25Free-Elo | 49 | 0.23 | 1 min |
| #2 | hemo dogg | 47 | 0.25 | 2 min |
| #3 | Puhti | 25 | 0.19 | 0 min |
| #4 | sakkkeli | 14 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | -25Free-Elo | +2.00 | 62 | 59 |
| #2 | hemo dogg | +1.86 | 76 | 89 |
| #3 | sakkkeli | +0.09 | 79 | 73 |
| #4 | rÖÖkie | -0.08 | 74 | 55 |
| #5 | Puhti | -3.50 | 54 | 56 |





