








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 150 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 70 matches | ||
| Premier | 17 matches | ||
| Wingman | 11 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




26 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1241 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,176 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 715 | 23% |
| Smokes | 1066 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 678 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 717 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $303,603 of utility $126 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 57 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Algor1Tmus | 50% | 10 |
| #2 | ✪ Farrell | 47% | 30 |
| #3 | 丂ㄒ卂尺乃ㄖㄚㄚ | 46% | 41 |
| #4 | RedkyS | 44% | 9 |
| #5 | Jayk3M v metafly bundě | 42% | 26 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Jayk3M v metafly bundě | 42% | 26 |
| #6 | Ti4nJi | 40% | 10 |
| #7 | Fr0d00000 | 40% | 15 |
| #8 | KOKYy | 38% | 26 |
| #9 | n3uroL | 33% | 6 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 丂ㄒ卂尺乃ㄖㄚㄚ | 3 | 0.0032 |
| #2 | ✪ Farrell | 3 | 0.0052 |
| #3 | Jayk3M v metafly bundě | 2 | 0.0030 |
| #4 | Algor1Tmus | 1 | 0.0042 |
| #5 | Ti4nJi | 1 | 0.0047 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jayk3M v metafly bundě | 123 | 0.18 | 4 min |
| #2 | KOKYy | 114 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| #3 | 丂ㄒ卂尺乃ㄖㄚㄚ | 34 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| #4 | Algor1Tmus | 32 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| #5 | Ti4nJi | 31 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jayk3M v metafly bundě | +1.57 | 86 | 72 |
| #2 | ✪ Farrell | +1.40 | 80 | 48 |
| #3 | Fr0d00000 | +1.20 | 80 | 57 |
| #4 | RedkyS | +1.15 | 72 | 12 |
| #5 | KOKYy | +0.97 | 86 | 66 |





