








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 350 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 105 matches | ||
| Faceit | 52 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




43 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2252 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,418 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2005 | 31% |
| Smokes | 1324 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 1274 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 1815 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $758,239 of utility $158 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 871 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jonald | 57% | 88 |
| #2 | Tuke | 54% | 24 |
| #3 | bebe ✟ | 52% | 60 |
| #4 | Peku | 51% | 37 |
| #5 | Jake | 50% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Peku | 51% | 37 |
| #5 | Jake | 50% | 14 |
| #6 | Käri C | 48% | 50 |
| #7 | tohi | 43% | 21 |
| #8 | PENEST | 42% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bebe ✟ | 9 | 0.0075 |
| #2 | Peku | 6 | 0.0083 |
| #3 | Jake | 6 | 0.0236 |
| #4 | Jonald | 4 | 0.0022 |
| #5 | Käri C | 3 | 0.0028 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bebe ✟ | 216 | 0.18 | 4 min |
| #2 | Jonald | 168 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| #3 | Käri C | 140 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| #4 | Peku | 97 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| #5 | Tuke | 37 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Peku | +2.67 | 81 | 51 |
| #2 | mike | +0.91 | 74 | 50 |
| #3 | Käri C | +0.71 | 67 | 56 |
| #4 | Jake | +0.71 | 97 | 47 |
| #5 | Jonald | +0.26 | 77 | 54 |





