








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 749 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 220 matches | ||
| Wingman | 42 matches | ||
| Faceit | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 14 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




36 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3194 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,349 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4024 | 48% |
| Smokes | 3701 | 44% |
| HE Grenades | 404 | 5% |
| Molotovs | 220 | 3% |
Our logs show you have wasted $875,325 of utility $124 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 244 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | chipspåse827 | 59% | 71 |
| #2 | natchochips12 | 54% | 189 |
| #3 | Ollemine12 | 49% | 233 |
| #4 | Volvo 960 | 42% | 33 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | chipspåse827 | 59% | 71 |
| #2 | natchochips12 | 54% | 189 |
| #3 | Ollemine12 | 49% | 233 |
| #4 | Volvo 960 | 42% | 33 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ollemine12 | 64 | 0.0138 |
| #2 | natchochips12 | 39 | 0.0103 |
| #3 | chipspåse827 | 7 | 0.0047 |
| #4 | Volvo 960 | 5 | 0.0073 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ollemine12 | 1378 | 0.30 | 24 min |
| #2 | natchochips12 | 326 | 0.09 | 8 min |
| #3 | chipspåse827 | 56 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| #4 | Volvo 960 | 40 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | chipspåse827 | +2.19 | 72 | 20 |
| #2 | Skalman | +1.58 | 64 | 50 |
| #3 | natchochips12 | +0.13 | 64 | 32 |
| #4 | Ollemine12 | -1.05 | 42 | 36 |
| #5 | Volvo 960 | -5.88 | 16 | 27 |





