








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 17 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
116 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 336 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 153 | 46% |
| Smokes | 55 | 16% |
| HE Grenades | 52 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 76 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $42,721 of utility $92 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Helena Signaal Cherry | 38% | 8 |
| #6 | imoelestkids:) | 38% | 8 |
| #7 | mirek | 36% | 11 |
| #8 | gene-neh | 0% | 2 |
| #9 | mononukleoos | 0% | 3 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mirek | 9 | 0.0479 |
| #2 | Helena Signaal Cherry | 6 | 0.0414 |
| #3 | mononukleoos | 5 | 0.1020 |
| #4 | the sock with a hole in de_nuke | 3 | 0.0600 |
| #5 | imoelestkids:) | 2 | 0.0156 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HD | +4.50 | 9 | 50 |
| #2 | mirek | +4.11 | 41 | 44 |
| #3 | imoelestkids:) | +3.65 | 26 | 46 |
| #4 | the sock with a hole in de_nuke | +3.53 | 47 | 27 |
| #5 | mononukleoos | +2.62 | 25 | 1 |





