








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 5 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
170 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 66 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3 | 5% |
| Smokes | 7 | 11% |
| HE Grenades | 44 | 67% |
| Molotovs | 12 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $24,132 of utility $21 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Horizon | 47% | 17 |
| #2 | AaronJ | 46% | 26 |
| #3 | Fiddy P | 43% | 44 |
| #4 | Jaylen | 43% | 51 |
| #5 | Painyyy | 32% | 19 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | AaronJ | 46% | 26 |
| #3 | Fiddy P | 43% | 44 |
| #4 | Jaylen | 43% | 51 |
| #5 | Painyyy | 32% | 19 |
| #6 | Miqo | 25% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jaylen | 13 | 0.0131 |
| #2 | Fiddy P | 5 | 0.0059 |
| #3 | AaronJ | 2 | 0.0039 |
| #4 | Painyyy | 1 | 0.0026 |
| #5 | Miqo | 1 | 0.0067 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fiddy P | 115 | 0.14 | 4 min |
| #2 | Jaylen | 103 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #3 | Horizon | 94 | 0.28 | 3 min |
| #4 | AaronJ | 26 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #5 | Painyyy | 17 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Horizon | +5.33 | 83 | 63 |
| #2 | Jaylen | +3.64 | 69 | 60 |
| #3 | Fiddy P | +3.14 | 69 | 59 |
| #4 | Painyyy | +1.97 | 86 | 42 |
| #5 | AaronJ | +1.48 | 64 | 61 |





