










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 497 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 188 matches | ||
| Premier | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 18 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2306 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,955 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1756 | 29% |
| Smokes | 1975 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 1018 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 1206 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,181,273 of utility $249 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 492 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | misu | 63% | 16 |
| #2 | fabiansmh on snap | 53% | 64 |
| #3 | Nebunuuu | 50% | 171 |
| #4 | H Ψ D R A | 45% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | misu | 63% | 16 |
| #2 | fabiansmh on snap | 53% | 64 |
| #3 | Nebunuuu | 50% | 171 |
| #4 | H Ψ D R A | 45% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | misu | 3 | 0.0109 |
| #2 | fabiansmh on snap | 2 | 0.0015 |
| #3 | Nebunuuu | 1 | 0.0003 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nebunuuu | 161 | 0.04 | 4 min |
| #2 | fabiansmh on snap | 123 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #3 | H Ψ D R A | 76 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| #4 | misu | 22 | 0.08 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | misu | +2.87 | 99 | 40 |
| #2 | Nebunuuu | +1.06 | 75 | 53 |
| #3 | cox69 | +0.51 | 72 | 53 |
| #4 | fabiansmh on snap | -0.86 | 61 | 52 |
| #5 | H Ψ D R A | -4.42 | 32 | 43 |





