










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Office | 29 matches | ||
| Premier | 26 matches | ||
| Wingman | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
846 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,854 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 398 | 21% |
| Smokes | 373 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 539 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 544 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $322,364 of utility $182 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 384 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sna1r | 75% | 8 |
| #2 | Thanos | 70% | 10 |
| #3 | Jew jitsu (<:) | 50% | 6 |
| #4 | Gyurcsány Ferenc "CS2.ME" | 45% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sna1r | 75% | 8 |
| #2 | Thanos | 70% | 10 |
| #3 | Jew jitsu (<:) | 50% | 6 |
| #4 | Gyurcsány Ferenc "CS2.ME" | 45% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jew jitsu (<:) | 2 | 0.0169 |
| #2 | Gyurcsány Ferenc "CS2.ME" | 1 | 0.0024 |
| #3 | Sna1r | 1 | 0.0063 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gyurcsány Ferenc "CS2.ME" | 28 | 0.07 | 0 min |
| #2 | Thanos | 26 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #3 | Sna1r | 16 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #4 | Jew jitsu (<:) | 11 | 0.09 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jew jitsu (<:) | +8.55 | 87 | 49 |
| #2 | Sna1r | +2.46 | 81 | 46 |
| #3 | A̷g̷r̷3s̷s̷z̷ør | -0.54 | 51 | 41 |
| #4 | Thanos | -1.79 | 3 | 42 |
| #5 | Gyurcsány Ferenc "CS2.ME" | -2.17 | 6 | 35 |





