








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 614 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 318 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 50 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2224 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,086 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2019 | 18% |
| Smokes | 4154 | 37% |
| HE Grenades | 2312 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 2601 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,389,805 of utility $189 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 100 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #14 | Yared | 38% | 21 |
| #15 | Paizão ×͜ × | 33% | 24 |
| #16 | Benjamin Arrola | 32% | 19 |
| #17 | ' brn1™ ✌ | 30% | 30 |
| #18 | S4L4M3 | 29% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ϟ F31PS | 8 | 0.0023 |
| #2 | γɒɿɘb | 4 | 0.0040 |
| #3 | JaCOzeRa | 3 | 0.0020 |
| #4 | Papai Smurf | 2 | 0.0027 |
| #5 | Lavanka | 2 | 0.0054 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | γɒɿɘb | +2.46 | 74 | 76 |
| #2 | 乂卂丨 | +1.31 | 63 | 56 |
| #3 | Delta | +1.25 | 66 | 53 |
| #4 | ϟ F31PS | +1.07 | 62 | 73 |
| #5 | Yared | +0.89 | 71 | 76 |





