










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 161 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 118 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 83 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 59 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 57 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 57 matches | ||
| Premier | 52 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 122 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




58 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4911 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 17,295 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3821 | 22% |
| Smokes | 4625 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 5432 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 3417 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,171,278 of utility $94 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 4893 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MONKE | 64% | 73 |
| #2 | - Polar!s - | 60% | 35 |
| #3 | Slushhy | 55% | 176 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MONKE | 64% | 73 |
| #2 | - Polar!s - | 60% | 35 |
| #3 | Slushhy | 55% | 176 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Slushhy | 6 | 0.0017 |
| #2 | MONKE | 2 | 0.0014 |
| #3 | - Polar!s - | 2 | 0.0030 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Slushhy | 456 | 0.13 | 11 min |
| #2 | MONKE | 75 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #3 | - Polar!s - | 27 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MONKE | +4.90 | 80 | 46 |
| #2 | ᴛʀᴜᴇᴛʜʀᴇᴀᴛ | +3.02 | 56 | 58 |
| #3 | - Polar!s - | -0.30 | 51 | 36 |
| #4 | Slushhy | -0.36 | 46 | 54 |





