








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 91 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 84 matches | ||
| Wingman | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 14 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
685 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,393 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 270 | 19% |
| Smokes | 350 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 469 | 34% |
| Molotovs | 304 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $831,356 of utility $346 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 215 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Josy | 57% | 7 |
| #2 | BladeV | 43% | 23 |
| #3 | BRR BRR PATAPIM | 43% | 30 |
| #4 | Adobe Photoshop | 30% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Josy | 57% | 7 |
| #2 | BladeV | 43% | 23 |
| #3 | BRR BRR PATAPIM | 43% | 30 |
| #4 | Adobe Photoshop | 30% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BladeV | 10 | 0.0213 |
| #2 | BRR BRR PATAPIM | 8 | 0.0147 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BladeV | 21 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| #2 | BRR BRR PATAPIM | 20 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| #3 | Josy | 16 | 0.12 | 0 min |
| #4 | Adobe Photoshop | 8 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BladeV | +4.45 | 77 | 43 |
| #2 | BRR BRR PATAPIM | +3.77 | 67 | 45 |
| #3 | Josy | +3.37 | 12 | 43 |
| #4 | Tralalero Tralala | -0.48 | 36 | 31 |
| #5 | Adobe Photoshop | -2.97 | 31 | 42 |





