








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 42 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 108 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Premier | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1226 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 614 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 316 | 51% |
| Smokes | 90 | 15% |
| HE Grenades | 109 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 99 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $204,572 of utility $78 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 32 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sol | 60% | 25 |
| #2 | Azzeon | 50% | 12 |
| #3 | 1933 Fuller Dymaxion | 40% | 10 |
| #4 | SuperObama | 38% | 13 |
| #5 | skidmark422 | 27% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Azzeon | 50% | 12 |
| #3 | 1933 Fuller Dymaxion | 40% | 10 |
| #4 | SuperObama | 38% | 13 |
| #5 | skidmark422 | 27% | 11 |
| #6 | alt+f4 | 18% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SuperObama | 7 | 0.0282 |
| #2 | 1933 Fuller Dymaxion | 4 | 0.0198 |
| #3 | Azzeon | 3 | 0.0124 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SuperObama | 16 | 0.06 | 0 min |
| #2 | skidmark422 | 12 | 0.06 | 0 min |
| #3 | alt+f4 | 11 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| #4 | sol | 9 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| #5 | Azzeon | 4 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sol | +4.88 | 66 | 18 |
| #2 | Azzeon | +1.90 | 74 | 21 |
| #3 | skidmark422 | +1.31 | 62 | 34 |
| #4 | Bingus | -0.18 | 42 | 22 |
| #5 | SuperObama | -3.35 | 25 | 35 |





