








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1285 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 636 matches | ||
| Premier | 155 matches | ||
| Wingman | 53 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 135 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




25 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8662 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 34,614 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 9838 | 28% |
| Smokes | 9307 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 8809 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 6660 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,006,864 of utility $157 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 243 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Edepoju | 10 | 0.0013 |
| #2 | Eke | 7 | 0.0010 |
| #3 | arde-1 | 5 | 0.0007 |
| #4 | Haukka | 4 | 0.0005 |
| #5 | Heiska57 | 3 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Haukka | 1451 | 0.18 | 47 min |
| #2 | arde-1 | 1226 | 0.16 | 40 min |
| #3 | Eke | 784 | 0.11 | 22 min |
| #4 | Edepoju | 768 | 0.10 | 19 min |
| #5 | Swingi | 670 | 0.17 | 19 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Eke | +2.75 | 80 | 72 |
| #2 | Knight Rider | +2.20 | 62 | 67 |
| #3 | arde-1 | +0.90 | 58 | 74 |
| #4 | Swingi | +0.37 | 58 | 73 |
| #5 | Heiska57 | +0.19 | 48 | 58 |





