








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 367 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 76 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 12 matches | ||
| Premier | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1635 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,556 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2901 | 44% |
| Smokes | 1921 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 415 | 6% |
| Molotovs | 1319 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $913,553 of utility $178 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 122 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | shadow_cat63 | 54% | 65 |
| #2 | Zephyr | 45% | 144 |
| #3 | WhyNot | 42% | 52 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | shadow_cat63 | 54% | 65 |
| #2 | Zephyr | 45% | 144 |
| #3 | WhyNot | 42% | 52 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | shadow_cat63 | 13 | 0.0101 |
| #2 | Zephyr | 2 | 0.0007 |
| #3 | WhyNot | 1 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zephyr | 336 | 0.12 | 6 min |
| #2 | WhyNot | 133 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #3 | shadow_cat63 | 119 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zephyr | +2.30 | 67 | 52 |
| #2 | shadow_cat63 | +0.49 | 66 | 38 |
| #3 | WhyNot | -1.61 | 26 | 30 |
| #4 | Zenon [54] | -2.08 | 49 | 58 |





