








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 298 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 199 matches | ||
| Wingman | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 30 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




101 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2423 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,927 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3085 | 28% |
| Smokes | 3340 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 2456 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 2046 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $656,988 of utility $117 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 947 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ Conrad. | 45% | 55 |
| #2 | MrBauer | 45% | 86 |
| #3 | b l a c K 失戀 | 45% | 49 |
| #4 | Kirax | 44% | 97 |
| #5 | oh ok | 43% | 74 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | MrBauer | 45% | 86 |
| #3 | b l a c K 失戀 | 45% | 49 |
| #4 | Kirax | 44% | 97 |
| #5 | oh ok | 43% | 74 |
| #6 | smurf chad | 40% | 45 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | oh ok | 18 | 0.0117 |
| #2 | smurf chad | 15 | 0.0167 |
| #3 | Kirax | 7 | 0.0035 |
| #4 | MrBauer | 6 | 0.0033 |
| #5 | b l a c K 失戀 | 4 | 0.0038 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kirax | 437 | 0.22 | 11 min |
| #2 | MrBauer | 409 | 0.22 | 11 min |
| #3 | ✪ Conrad. | 278 | 0.24 | 7 min |
| #4 | oh ok | 259 | 0.17 | 6 min |
| #5 | b l a c K 失戀 | 172 | 0.16 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MrBauer | +2.47 | 81 | 82 |
| #2 | ✪ Conrad. | +0.65 | 63 | 69 |
| #3 | b l a c K 失戀 | +0.20 | 76 | 60 |
| #4 | SnoX | -0.10 | 72 | 59 |
| #5 | oh ok | -0.50 | 62 | 58 |





