








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 414 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 21 matches | ||
| Premier | 18 matches | ||
| Wingman | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 12 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
846 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,210 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 293 | 13% |
| Smokes | 729 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 505 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 683 | 31% |
Our logs show you have wasted $405,292 of utility $212 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 65 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Adel Arne | 67% | 12 |
| #2 | Vince the Prince | 51% | 51 |
| #3 | MM | 50% | 12 |
| #4 | smör gås | 39% | 38 |
| #5 | B I G BeniZ | 33% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Vince the Prince | 51% | 51 |
| #3 | MM | 50% | 12 |
| #4 | smör gås | 39% | 38 |
| #5 | B I G BeniZ | 33% | 9 |
| #6 | Kapten Klotpung | 14% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MM | 3 | 0.0118 |
| #2 | Vince the Prince | 2 | 0.0020 |
| #3 | smör gås | 2 | 0.0029 |
| #4 | B I G BeniZ | 2 | 0.0114 |
| #5 | Adel Arne | 1 | 0.0041 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | smör gås | 142 | 0.21 | 3 min |
| #2 | Vince the Prince | 139 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| #3 | MM | 17 | 0.07 | 0 min |
| #4 | B I G BeniZ | 17 | 0.10 | 0 min |
| #5 | Kapten Klotpung | 14 | 0.10 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vince the Prince | +2.77 | 86 | 58 |
| #2 | Anton | +1.30 | 70 | 48 |
| #3 | B I G BeniZ | +0.29 | 55 | 33 |
| #4 | smör gås | +0.13 | 80 | 52 |
| #5 | Adel Arne | -1.49 | 38 | 17 |





