








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 303 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 275 matches | ||
| Wingman | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 17 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2908 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,317 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1409 | 19% |
| Smokes | 2557 | 35% |
| HE Grenades | 1301 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 2050 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,571,875 of utility $192 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 128 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pixerler | 59% | 22 |
| #2 | flood | 55% | 29 |
| #3 | kram | 54% | 35 |
| #4 | [Swe] 𝕬𝖓𝖌𝖊𝖑 | 43% | 21 |
| #5 | Hazz | 41% | 46 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | flood | 55% | 29 |
| #3 | kram | 54% | 35 |
| #4 | [Swe] 𝕬𝖓𝖌𝖊𝖑 | 43% | 21 |
| #5 | Hazz | 41% | 46 |
| #6 | ♡𝔀𝓲𝓯𝓮𝔂♡ | 28% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pixerler | 2 | 0.0045 |
| #2 | Hazz | 1 | 0.0011 |
| #3 | kram | 1 | 0.0015 |
| #4 | ♡𝔀𝓲𝓯𝓮𝔂♡ | 1 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | flood | 125 | 0.21 | 3 min |
| #2 | kram | 71 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #3 | Pixerler | 24 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #4 | [Swe] 𝕬𝖓𝖌𝖊𝖑 | 18 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #5 | Hazz | 8 | 0.01 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kram | +4.62 | 73 | 68 |
| #2 | flood | +2.51 | 78 | 61 |
| #3 | [Swe] 𝕬𝖓𝖌𝖊𝖑 | +0.95 | 48 | 53 |
| #4 | Pixerler | +0.51 | 62 | 49 |
| #5 | NaD | -0.13 | 49 | 42 |





