








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 221 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 138 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 21 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1781 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,751 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2623 | 27% |
| Smokes | 2829 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 1860 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 2439 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $429,139 of utility $111 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 95 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | DONNIE DARKO | 46% | 13 |
| #10 | Noname | 45% | 111 |
| #11 | hnslol | 44% | 117 |
| #12 | realstoned | 43% | 83 |
| #13 | ABSTRAKT | 43% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Noname | 3 | 0.0012 |
| #2 | Dorfschmied | 3 | 0.0080 |
| #3 | hnslol | 1 | 0.0004 |
| #4 | realstoned | 1 | 0.0005 |
| #5 | XyM | 1 | 0.0028 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hnslol | 326 | 0.12 | 8 min |
| #2 | Noname | 267 | 0.11 | 6 min |
| #3 | realstoned | 262 | 0.14 | 6 min |
| #4 | TDeus | 209 | 0.16 | 5 min |
| #5 | right | 169 | 0.27 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | .KLANTE_only | +0.80 | 67 | 64 |
| #2 | realstoned | +0.62 | 78 | 70 |
| #3 | TDeus | +0.62 | 79 | 63 |
| #4 | THEJNGG0D | +0.52 | 65 | 77 |
| #5 | XyM | +0.41 | 74 | 60 |





