










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 74 matches | ||
| Premier | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 8 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




41 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2028 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,341 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2162 | 40% |
| Smokes | 1259 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 869 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 1051 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $509,709 of utility $146 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 294 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | $ Sparrow | 44% | 34 |
| #2 | anu | 39% | 18 |
| 33% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | $ Sparrow | 44% | 34 |
| #2 | anu | 39% | 18 |
| 33% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| 5 | 0.0136 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | anu | 74 | 0.20 | 1 min |
| #2 | $ Sparrow | 62 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| 17 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dox1est | +1.49 | 78 | 56 |
| #2 | $ Sparrow | +0.56 | 69 | 59 |
| #3 | anu | -1.34 | 67 | 59 |
| -2.57 | 42 | 31 |





