








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 34 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 106 matches | ||
| Premier | 80 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Faceit | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1734 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,873 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 672 | 17% |
| Smokes | 737 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 1336 | 34% |
| Molotovs | 1128 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $488,921 of utility $102 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 21 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chicken Joe | 11 | 0.0051 |
| #2 | Tex | 8 | 0.0057 |
| #3 | J1Nz | 8 | 0.0192 |
| #4 | crysh | 6 | 0.0085 |
| #5 | voo | 3 | 0.0036 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chicken Joe | 557 | 0.26 | 14 min |
| #2 | Tex | 243 | 0.17 | 6 min |
| #3 | voo | 144 | 0.17 | 3 min |
| #4 | J1Nz | 91 | 0.22 | 2 min |
| #5 | crysh | 46 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | J1Nz | +5.13 | 76 | 44 |
| #2 | Tex | +2.11 | 44 | 60 |
| #3 | crysh | +1.66 | 84 | 29 |
| #4 | voo | +0.64 | 56 | 51 |
| #5 | JOE | +0.11 | 41 | 42 |





