








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 538 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 132 matches | ||
| Wingman | 47 matches | ||
| Faceit | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




20 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2577 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,142 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1852 | 26% |
| Smokes | 1486 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 2077 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 1727 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $672,879 of utility $115 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 102 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kermiss | 75% | 16 |
| #2 | nosse | 60% | 20 |
| #3 | Yemen’s GOD | 59% | 17 |
| #4 | JugurttiPoika | 50% | 42 |
| #5 | Jutisee | 50% | 50 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | Fufutti | 43% | 21 |
| #10 | utii | 42% | 19 |
| #11 | Geggo | 42% | 24 |
| #12 | Kaltsu | 33% | 18 |
| #13 | Zewenix | 32% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jerppa | 19 | 0.0284 |
| #2 | Juba | 11 | 0.0217 |
| #3 | Fufutti | 7 | 0.0169 |
| #4 | Kermiss | 7 | 0.0219 |
| #5 | Jutisee | 6 | 0.0065 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JugurttiPoika | 169 | 0.21 | 5 min |
| #2 | EeDu | 106 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #3 | Jutisee | 74 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #4 | Zewenix | 71 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| #5 | Kermiss | 47 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nosse | +8.03 | 87 | 45 |
| #2 | Kermiss | +2.00 | 70 | 45 |
| #3 | Fufutti | +1.52 | 84 | 46 |
| #4 | EeDu | +1.47 | 88 | 46 |
| #5 | Jerppa | +1.38 | 74 | 27 |





