








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 33 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 5 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
160 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 85 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 10 | 12% |
| Smokes | 25 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 28 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 22 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $4,455 of utility $18 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Orbz | 100% | 2 |
| #2 | scar | 100% | 2 |
| #3 | Ralle | 100% | 4 |
| #4 | and | 80% | 10 |
| #5 | s^ | 78% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Ralle | 100% | 4 |
| #4 | and | 80% | 10 |
| #5 | s^ | 78% | 9 |
| #6 | pinqus | 75% | 8 |
| #7 | Mir00o | Prodigy | 71% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | and | 2 | 0.0096 |
| #2 | s^ | 1 | 0.0054 |
| #3 | Orbz | 1 | 0.0270 |
| #4 | scar | 1 | 0.0270 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | and | 58 | 0.28 | 1 min |
| #2 | pinqus | 48 | 0.27 | 1 min |
| #3 | Mir00o | Prodigy | 17 | 0.11 | 0 min |
| #4 | Orbz | 12 | 0.32 | 1 min |
| #5 | s^ | 7 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | s^ | +4.15 | 85 | 51 |
| #2 | pinqus | +2.78 | 90 | 67 |
| #3 | Ralle | +2.02 | 81 | 61 |
| #4 | SikeToLucky | +1.60 | 89 | 13 |
| #5 | scar | +0.54 | 68 | 46 |





