








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 16 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 23 matches | ||
| Premier | 3 matches | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
347 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 778 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 189 | 24% |
| Smokes | 191 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 161 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 237 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $112,388 of utility $148 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | NiKo | 56% | 9 |
| #2 | mate-d | 20% | 5 |
| #3 | bu? | 0% | 3 |
| #4 | tomy | 0% | 4 |
| #5 | Vc me chamo de pretoo? | 0% | 4 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | NiKo | 56% | 9 |
| #2 | mate-d | 20% | 5 |
| #3 | bu? | 0% | 3 |
| #4 | tomy | 0% | 4 |
| #5 | Vc me chamo de pretoo? | 0% | 4 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mate-d | 1 | 0.0086 |
| #2 | Vc me chamo de pretoo? | 1 | 0.0115 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mate-d | 16 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| #2 | Vc me chamo de pretoo? | 16 | 0.18 | 0 min |
| #3 | bu? | 9 | 0.14 | 0 min |
| #4 | NiKo | 6 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| #5 | tomy | 3 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lic4n_ | +2.25 | 67 | 41 |
| #2 | Vc me chamo de pretoo? | +1.51 | 81 | 62 |
| #3 | bu? | +1.25 | 67 | 43 |
| #4 | mate-d | +0.28 | 76 | 44 |
| #5 | NiKo | -0.51 | 70 | 52 |





