








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 4 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
162 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 757 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 274 | 36% |
| Smokes | 132 | 17% |
| HE Grenades | 110 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 241 | 32% |
Our logs show you have wasted $15,324 of utility $25 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fistaszio_ | 67% | 6 |
| #2 | xemi | 57% | 7 |
| #3 | saLLey | 52% | 25 |
| #4 | AreZZuu | 50% | 20 |
| #5 | geet | 50% | 24 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | xemi | 57% | 7 |
| #3 | saLLey | 52% | 25 |
| #4 | AreZZuu | 50% | 20 |
| #5 | geet | 50% | 24 |
| #6 | norbi <3 | 33% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | geet | 1 | 0.0020 |
| #2 | norbi <3 | 1 | 0.0050 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AreZZuu | 60 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| #2 | saLLey | 46 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #3 | geet | 34 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #4 | norbi <3 | 10 | 0.05 | 0 min |
| #5 | Fistaszio_ | 6 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | xemi | +2.61 | 64 | 54 |
| #2 | geet | +1.90 | 73 | 68 |
| #3 | Fistaszio_ | +1.70 | 89 | 42 |
| #4 | AreZZuu | +1.28 | 73 | 62 |
| #5 | norbi <3 | -1.46 | 47 | 29 |





