








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 619 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 57 matches | ||
| Wingman | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 19 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1417 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,932 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 380 | 20% |
| Smokes | 559 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 299 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 694 | 36% |
Our logs show you have wasted $455,791 of utility $130 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 642 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zombiebender656 | 57% | 23 |
| #2 | Eggscelent Warrior | 54% | 156 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zombiebender656 | 57% | 23 |
| #2 | Eggscelent Warrior | 54% | 156 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Eggscelent Warrior | 6 | 0.0022 |
| #2 | Zombiebender656 | 2 | 0.0046 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Eggscelent Warrior | 41 | 0.01 | 1 min |
| #2 | Zombiebender656 | 7 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Trash Boat | +1.45 | 45 | 26 |
| #2 | Eggscelent Warrior | +0.41 | 53 | 23 |
| #3 | Zombiebender656 | -0.90 | 14 | 11 |





